Grand Master Mark Shuey leads an army you don't want to mess with.

Last week, I saw this disturbing surveillance footage. It really does speak for itself and is just one example of a recent  rise in violence and robbery preying on seniors and people with disabilities. No one is off limits. (They probably never were.) Vulnerability equals victory for criminals (and sometimes cops) who figure disabled and frail means weak and easy. No more.  A new martial art is sweeping seniors centres across the U.S. Grandpa and grandma are learning how to kick ass with Cane-Fu.

Popularized in America by Mark Shuey and his Cane Masters self-defense system , Cane-Fu comes from the Korean martial art of Hapkido, which has incorporated canes in its weapons training since its inception following WWII. Shuey is a 7th degree black belt in Hapkido, trained mainly by one of Chuck Norris’ own black belt level students.  Shuey’s  Cane Masters self-defense regimen includes a full marketing onslaught of books, dvds, seminars, certified teaching dojos all over the world, and hand-carved, hardwood combat canes direct from Shuey’s own workshops on Lake Tahoe and in Flordia. Though his technique is most widely known, he’s not the only one teaching his own brand of Hapkido as a self-defence technique.

Ted Truscott has over 30 years of karate experience and at his Yama Neko Dojo in Langford, B.C. he teaches the Cane-Fu techniques and aerobic exercises he popularized in his two Raising Canes dvds. His tactics are a little more defensive than Shuey’s, but both masters definitely have something to offer–and not just to seniors.

“If you can dance and play golf or tennis, you can use a cane for self-defense,” says Truscott, but, as a cane owner myself, I don’t even think you need that much mobility to use a cane to defend yourself.  I holster my cane near the armrest of my scooter, so if I ever need to be a street fight hero, more than likely I’ll be doing it from a sitting position. All you would need is average uper body strength and Cane-Fu could easily be adapted to people with disabilities. I can’t help but think that if the man in the surveillance footage had a cane on the back of his chair, he may have been able to turn the tide.

Batter Up! Ted Trescott walks quietly, but carries a big stick.

There is one thing I’m missing though.  Truscott says that aluminum drugstore canes with short wooden handles, like mine, are effective for combat. However, mastering Cane-Fu is best done with a combat cane that includes a modified wider crook, perfect for wrapping around the neck of a home invader and forcefully directing him back towards the door.  The crooked canes are more versatile, so the combatant has more moves in their arsenal, for gripping, throwing and generally controling their opponent. Wider crooks are also safer to twirl, since your hand could get caught in the traditional narrow crook. There is some division though about just how durable the hardwood combat canes are when put through their paces, but if you’re really suspicious you can order a heavier, clear lucite combat cane that will solve the durability problem.

Wherever I travel through the streets, I find myself constantly casing my surroundings like a gimp Jason Bourne. (How many exits? Where’s the fire alarm? What’s the ratio of men to women in  room? What makes a good improvised weapon in a pinch? Who already has a boyfriend? Can I take them? etc.) As a scooter driver, I have a distinct advantage over my adversary, as well as the walking senior citizen that’s normally targeted for Cane-Fu classes. (Electric chairs have the same advantage too.)  First of all, I move faster than walking speed (approx 6-7 km/hr.) and simple physics tells us that a cane traveling faster packs a much bigger whallup.  (I’d like to see you limbo under that.) Second, the scooter runs on electricity, so it travels in absolute silence. I can literally be right against your ass before you’ll even notice I’m there, perfect for a sneak attack.

Some combatants are taking the “sneak” part of the attack further by adding a little something extra to their cane. Cane Masters sells canes that have a few additional modifications, like a sharp, pointy, bird or viper head at the end of the crook, great for adding that extra painful sting to a strike.  Shark’s teeth bites are also carved in along the shaft of the cane  to add a grating burn as you rake it across the body of an adversary. There’s debate among Shuey and Truscott, as to whether these modified canes are advisable for purchase. Truscott argues that a cane like that may get you unwanted attention at an airport and may make it more difficult to prove you were acting in self-defense on your court date. However, the cane is completely legal and Shuey’s site promotes it as the only legal weapon you can carry into the passanger part of an airplane. The Homeland Security Act in the U.S. allows any kind of assistive device as long as it doesn’t hide a traditional weapon, like a sword cane. (Remember, these are the guys who consider it a fundamental right to bear arms.)  Personally, I would maximize the opportunity for as many modifications in the wood as possible, as long as they weren’t external or mechanized. As long as it’s part of the carve, I’d be happy to see what I could get away with.

Once you’re fully outfitted with the cane of your choice, buy a training dvd or join a dojo in your area.

I figured I’d give you a bit of a basic starter kit with some of the foundational moves of Cane-Fu below:

The Figure–Eight- Great for keeping people at a distance and a perfect aerobic warm up. Twirl the cane by the crook across your body in a figure-eight motion. For an extra challenge, try alternating hands as you twirl. Make sure your cane has a wide crook, so you can keep your hands intact.

The Cross-Body Block- Hold the cane horizontally with both hands across your body and thrust it outward, or on an angle near the top of the head, to block. If you are able, stepping into the rapid move as you thrust can push your attacker off balance. You may also want to thrust across the throat, or push an attacker against a wall this way.

The Two-handed Jab- Hold the cane like a spear with the tip facing out from your body, one hand on the shaft near the crook, and the other further down the shaft closer to the tip. Then rapidly thrust out from your body, aiming for the bladder, stomach and solar-plexes.

Low Crook strike- Swing  the cane like a bat aiming for the ankle with the crook facing your opponent.  Strike the ankle with the crook and  then hook the ankle with the crook once you make impact, pulling the cane back hard towards your body, so you trip your opponent.

Mid-range Crook  Strike- Swing the crook end of the cane from the side to strike the ribs and then pull the cane back  towards you really hard,  so the sharp horn digs into your attacker’s back.

Groin Strike- Hold the cane vertically with both hands, like a reverse letter “J”, with the sharp horn end of the crook facing toward your attacker. Then step in close to your attacker, as you pull up toward the sky with the crook between his legs. A modified sharp horn adds extra pain to this move. You may also hold the cane in position as you pull upwards, so that you may strike his face with the butt-end of the shaft at the same time.

Rake- This is a vertically diagonal strike going down across your body on both sides, like you’re drawing an “X” in the air with the cane. With speed and aggressiveness you can rake it across the body or face of your opponent. With the added shark teeth modification in the wood, you can grate your attacker’s face like cheddar cheese.

If you’d like a visual demonstration, watch Mark Shuey’s Kata Demo here.

The best part about Cane-Fu is the way it takes advantage of the societal assumption of weakness among seniors and people with disabilities. Those who know Cane-Fu will always have a surprise in store for the rest of you, since no one expects a mild-mannered disabled person to fight back.

Kyle Maynard trains through the pain for his MMA debut.

It finally happened.

If I ever needed proof that there are people out there who think exactly like I do, I got it Saturday, April 25th. Not too long ago, while watching UFC 97 live from Montreal, I posted the following on my Twitter Page:

“If there’s a paralympics, why can’t there be paraMMA? There are tons of disabled guys I’d love to take on.”

Well, someone who can actually do something about it was thinking the same thing. Kyle Maynard had already made a name for himself with a 35-16 amateur wrestling record and on April 20, 2009, he made his mixed martial arts debut. Oh, and I guess you’ll want to know: he was born without either arms or legs.

Even though there are people taking steps to get elements of mixed martial arts into the paralympics, at the moment there are no other disabled competitors, so the 134 lb. Kyle was booked to face the 137 lb., able-bodied, Bryan Fry–let’s not even talk about the reach advantage.  To understand the rest of today’s entry you’re going to have to see a clip of the fight here. since (for the moment) we can’t embed videos into the blog. UPDATE: Fixed! Here’s the clip:

What do you see?

I know that when I first saw it, part of me was amazed he actually pulled it off (although, he was denied a license to fight and was forced to fight in Alabama where there is no governing body for MMA,) but part of me was also repulsed by the absurdity of it all.

Granted, Kyle Maynard is no slouch. I wouldn’t expect him to take this fight anything but seriously. The fact that they found an opponent willing to take him on, not to mention a promoter willing to book him on a card, is a huge statement about how far society has come in regard to the capabilities of people with disabilities, but if he’s ever to step in the ring again, Maynard and anyone willing to step up and face him, will have to do a serious self-assessment.

Getting beyond the schmaltz of how “inspirational” he is, MMA is not wrestling.  In order to pin an opponent, you must get down to their level, which gives Maynard more than an opportunity to win every match he participates in. But MMA is all about the ability to change levels and obviously Maynard only has one. Running around on your stumps and avoiding any confrontation does not make an exciting fight, but I think most of the blame for this disproportionate chess match lies with his opponent.

This watershed moment in sports really speaks to the unease people still feel about hurting disabled people, even when those people want you to. If Bryan Fry was able to get over his trepidation and just go at Kyle Maynard full bore, intending to, um…beat the living shit out of him, it would’ve taught all involved a few things:

1)  A few kicks in the ribs and a face like a hamburger patty would’ve given us a definitive winner, an exciting fight, and taught Kyle Maynard that he should hold off on MMA until there are other disabled opponents for him to face. After all, Jeff Adams would look like just another man in a wheelchair if he raced Usain Bolt.

2) Fry’s continued bobbing, weaving and evading doesn’t do him any favors either. He comes off looking like a pussy who is either too afraid of the possibility of being taken down by someone with no limbs, or too concerned about hurting a consenting opponent.

The “kid glove” treatment (only punching Maynard a few times in an awkward bent-knee stance) just hurts both of them and leaves the fight community with more questions than answers.  How can Maynard get his licence now?  Sure, he has a fight under his belt and maybe he proved he could “adequately defend himself” but when nothing of consquence is coming at you, that’s very easy to do.  A knock-down drag-out would’ve given his state athletic commission a better idea of whether it was safe for him to compete because they could’ve measured the level of damage. Instead, all we got was a silly stalemate and I’m sure, in his most private moments, Maynard wanted more than “the old college try” from his big debut.

Oh, and if he ever wants a real opponent, who wouldn’t be afraid to hit him with reckless abandon,  my phone is always on.

Aaron is a freelance journalist living in Toronto. His work has appeared in Financial Post Business, Investment Executive Newspaper, and TV Week Magazine, along with Askmen.com. He is a regular contributor to Abilities Magazine and is currently plotting a weekly web comic called GIMP, with artist Jon Duguay, about a handicap school bus driver who wakes up after a crash to find he’s the last able-bodied person on earth — and he’s being hunted. aaron.broverman@gmail.com