Photo via Costumeish/costumeish.com

If you’re looking for a last-minute Halloween costume idea, sadly, Parisian Heist Robbery Victim is no longer an option. If you’re looking for an offensive costume you’ll just have to go as Donald Trump and his merry band of women-respecting hombres. If you don’t get the biggest Kit Kat complain loudly and repeatedly about how Halloween is rigged and be sure to grope every witch and grab every black cat along the way. 

The Parisian Heist Robbery Victim costume didn’t specifically mention Kim Kardashian or her traumatic October robbery—when the reality star was bound, gagged, and had a gun held to her head by robbers who made off with $10-million worth of jewellery—but it really didn’t need to. The $69.99 costume featured a long black wig, short white robe—what she was wearing when the crime took place—requisite large black sunglasses, a gag, rope, and a $4-million ring. The go-to look for a mother of two afraid for her life and terrified she was going to be raped or killed.

Costumeish.com, the makers of the awful costume, pulled it from the company’s website after complaints that the costume was offensive and mocked the violent incident. Sadly, it was not only the costume that was in poor taste. Following the incident, Kardashian was accused of faking the robbery, using it as a publicity stunt, or staging it so she could commit insurance fraud. She was criticized for flaunting her flashy lifestyle and bling ring on social media and for making it easy to track her movements via her numerous posts on Instagram. Even Karl Lagerfeld lashed out at Kardashian for constantly showing off her wealth. And if there’s one thing to be said about Lagerfeld it’s that he lives an extremely understated existence. The fashion designer really blends in.

@TheTorontoSun The Kim Kardashian robbery was a hoax. It never happened. It was a publicity stunt.

— John Harlow (@MysticKnight982) October 22, 2016

@KimKardashian held at gunpoint is this real or publicity stunt you never can tell these days.

— Darren-John Northall (@DAZrazzle85) October 3, 2016

not really buying this ‘kim kardashian was robbed of $10 MM in jewelry at gunpoint’ story. smells of insurance fraud / publicity stunt…

— Tom Quinn (@MQuinnton) October 3, 2016

The fact that the Kardashian robbery was repeatedly called a hoax and her pre- and post-robbery behaviour was carefully scrutinized served as just another painful reminder of pop culture’s gender bias when it comes to violence. Exclusive crime scene photos were published of Kardashian resting her internet-breaking butt on a couch and calmly Facetiming someone as police searched her Paris apartment and interviewed witnesses. Apparently, she should have been running hysterically around the apartment as women are meant to do. “Kim’s Story Doesn’t Add Up,” “No Sign of Struggles or Injuries,” and “Left $10 Million in Jewellery on the Counter” screamed the headlines. If Kim Kardashian was a man, the coverage would have been very different. I doubt anyone would ever accuse Kayne West of insurance fraud or faking a robbery, except maybe Taylor Swift.

As if the tabloid coverage wasn’t bad enough, internet and social media reaction to the robbery was cruel and dismissive. Twitter seemed to think taste in television programming is directly related to empathy and found it hard to embrace the possibility that one could not enjoy keeping up with the Kardashians and still think what happened to Kim was horrible. It’s okay, Twitter, supporting her won’t make me judge you. I get it you’re a big fan of PBS. Relax, I think you’re totally high brow.

One only needs to look at the recent coverage of Brangelina’s divorce to see pop culture’s double standard further played out. The violence that apparently led to Angelina Jolie filing for divorce has largely been downplayed by the media. There was allegedly a physical altercation on an overseas flight involving Brad Pitt and the oldest of the couple’s brood, Maddox. Pitt also apparently pissed on the side of a building upon deplaning and hijacked a golf cart to speed away from the plane. Trying to distance themselves from an air travel experience as quickly as possible, stars really are just like us!

Coverage of the incident and the divorce has been largely pro-Pitt with Jolie described as a “wife from hell,” “unstable and manipulative,” and a “liar.” Also, their sexless marriage drove him to cheat and he might be getting back with Jennifer Aniston because she’s just been hanging out with her Aveeno and Smart Water for the last 11 years waiting for Pitt. Have you seen the video of her husband Justin Theroux jogging in track pants? I think Jen is doing just fine.

The media never misses an opportunity to remind us of Jolie’s past drug use—heroin! Billy Bob Thornton musk!—and how she used to wear vials of blood around her neck. She is repeatedly referred to in the coverage as a “wild child,” which is pop culture speak for a grown woman who does not conform to their standards and behave as society would like her to. (See also: 1990s Drew Barrymore, 2007 Britney Spears, all the time Courtney Love, Miley Cyrus, and Lindsay Lohan.)

US Weekly also criticized Jolie’s humanitarian efforts and work, calling it a calculated image makeover and raising suspicion that all those orphanage visits, adoptions, and UN work was just some elaborate ruse to make her seem like a good person when she’s actually just a monster set on destroying Pitt’s life and launching an elaborate smear campaign.

Tabloids also reminded us of Jolie’s dating history which included, gasp, women. Implying bisexuals are shifty liars was a popular narrative during actress Amber Heard’s recent split from Johnny Depp. Heard’s stories of Depp’s abuse and violence were repeatedly questioned and she was called a “liar” and a “gold digger.” The biggest tragedy of the story seemed to be that Depp had to change the “Slim” tattoo he got in Heard’s honour to “Scum.” When it comes to violence against women, everyone knows tattoos are the real victims.

While negative coverage of Kardashian’s robbery continues and shows no sign of ending soon, positive pop culture coverage of male celebrities and violence continues to be the norm. When Chris Brown was arrested this summer for assault with a deadly weapon stories focussed on the credibility of his female victim, how the arrest was a set up, and mentioned Brown’s constitutional right to bear arms. Apparently, everyone forgot about Brown’s 2009 arrest for assaulting then girlfriend Rihanna or his raging anger issues. While gossip sites remember every Lindsay Lohan DUI and Chateau Marmont late night, Brown gets a pop culture hall pass. Brown even claimed he was the victim of a race war and started tweeting #blacklivesmatter. That PR move proved to be worse than the sum total of the singer’s musical output.

And speaking of Lohan, in August photos surfaced of the actress physically fighting on a beach with her fiancé. Lohan received no support from the tabloids who described the incident as a “play fight,” which is certainly not the impression one gets when they look at the photos of a clearly struggling Lohan. The actress later expressed fear that her fiancé was going to throw acid in her face and she was scared for her safety. Celebrity gossip sites continued to Regina George Lohan, implying she deserves little sympathy because of her wild child ways. Stories implied that Lohan deserved it because of the poor box office performance of I Know Who Killed Me or because she previously struggled with drugs and alcohol.

Despite the offensive costume and internet backlash, a spokesperson for the Kardashians has assured us Kim is shaken, but slowly recovering from the robbery. Filming on the reality star’s show was not taking place at the time of the incident so if you’re looking to see it covered on the small screen you’ll just have to settle for TMZ. Or give Karl Lagerfeld a call.

Collage by Dave Donald

Inside media’s troubling gender-biased coverage of celebrity meltdowns

Charlie Sheen took thinking outside the bun to a whole new level in July when he drunkenly wandered around a Taco Bell drive thru greeting fellow fast food visitors with “Sorry I am so fucking hammered.” Video of the incident soon made the rounds and the winning warlock was once again making headlines. As it did with the actor’s well-publicized 2011 meltdown, media covered Sheen’s bad behaviour like it was a sitcom—wondering what hilarity and hijinks he would get up to next. Then and now, his substance abuse problems, anti-Semitism, and responsibility for making #winning happen were largely swept under the rug. Little mention was made of his history of violence against
women or his lacklustre parenting record. Instead, Sheen landed a 2012 Rolling Stone cover and made several prime time appearances. He earned reported $1.8 million (U.S.) per episode of Two and a Half Men.

It doesn’t take long to see the double standard when it comes to celebrity meltdowns: Compare coverage of Sheen’s meltdown to that of Drake-lover Amanda Bynes or an umbrella-wielding Britney Spears. At the same time Sheen was gracing the cover of Rolling Stone, Lindsay Lohan appeared on the cover of Vanity Fair in a piece that painstakingly detailed Lohan’s substance abuse issues and legal troubles. It also made frequent reference to her haggard appearance and questioned whether she would ever, ever get her once-promising career back on track. The verdict: no. Sheen #winning. Lohan #tragic.

For bad boys like Sheen being bad is good for business. Not so much for Lohan. Her last film The Canyons was largely panned before it even hit theatres. Reviewers seemed unable to separate the Lohan they saw on the big screen with the Lohan they saw on the TMZ small screen. Lohan is definitely not the worst thing about The Canyons, but almost every review focussed on her performance and never missed an opportunity to refer to her as “embattled actress Lindsay Lohan” or “troubled starlet Lindsay Lohan.” Chris Brown is always just Chris Brown not “Rihanna beater Chris Brown” or “violent misogynist Chris Brown” or “serial douchebag Chris Brown.”

And then there’s Shia LaBeouf. Where do we even start? If you’re just joining the LaBeouf crazy train already in progress: he’s been arrested for disturbing a theatre performance (he didn’t care much for Cabaret); chased a homeless men around Times Square; plagiarized people; punched people; and just generally behaved bizarrely. He announced his retirement from acting—how very 2010 Joaquin Phoenix of him—and then appeared at a film festival sporting a paper bag over his head with “I’m Not Famous Anymore” scrawled on it. It turns out this was all part of a performance art piece called #IAMSORRY. Media coverage of the piece focussed on LaBeouf’s eccentricity and his valuable contribution to the dialogue around performance art. One media outlet even gathered a panel of performance artists to discuss LaBeouf’s work with one going so far as to say: “He’s starting a broad cultural discussion that needs to be had.”

Following his recent booze-fuelled NYC meltdown, the media speculated on whether LaBeouf would head to rehab. He was photographed carrying an AA book which was enough to satisfy bloggers who didn’t question whether LaBeouf was really serious about recovery or if the book was just a PR prop. There was mention of his mental state, but not nearly the coverage of say a 2007 head-shaving Spears. The consensus was that LaBeouf ’s career would recover—just maybe not as a theatre reviewer. Compare this to the seemingly endless column inches devoted to whether Lohan’s career will ever bounce back and speculation that the mean girl now uses her talent to trade blowies for blow.

Media rarely commented on LaBeouf’s appearance, despite the fact that disturbia could be used to refer to one of his films, as well as his approach to personal hygiene. Media coverage of Bynes’ meltdown focused largely on her physical appearance, commenting on what she wore and how much her appearance had changed—and not in a good way. The media regularly updates us on Sheen, while Bynes has received little post-meltdown coverage. Redemption stories
only get coverage when there’s a male protagonist. And while the Bynes story has a happy ending—post rehab she is doing better and has not once asked Drake to murder her vagina—that’s not always the case. If Lohan or Bynes were to die, they would get a media circus of Whitney Houston proportions, not the respectful coverage afforded Philip Seymour Hoffman or Heath Ledger.

I hope it doesn’t come to that, and that Lohan’s actually been punking us all this time. Soon she’ll announce it’s all been one big performance art piece. If she did, the media would no doubt accuse her of stealing LaBeouf’s paper bag and he’d be arrested for disrupting her show.

Lisa Whittington-Hill is the publisher of This Magazine, and like
Shia, she doesn’t care much for Cabaret.

How we imagine an “arty” Shia LeBeouf may look  || By User:Wiki Lon (Own work) [GPL (http://www.gnu.org/licenses/gpl.html)], via Wikimedia Commons

When male celebrities implode on the world stage, they’re arty heroes. When women do it, they’re called “troubled” and worse

Did you miss the recent Valentine’s Day announcement that winning warlock Charlie Sheen is getting married for the fourth time? Maybe you were busy having a life, or watching season two of House of Cards (SO GOOD!) or let your subscription to Winning Warlock Weekly lapse.

Who can blame you after Sheen’s well-publicized 2011 meltdown, or “meltforward” as he called it, complete with truth torpedos, goddesses and weird rants about tiger blood. The media covered Sheen’s meltdown—I refuse to make meltforward happen—like it was a sitcom or comedy tour, wondering what hilarity and hijinx Sheen would get up to next. His history of violence against women, substance abuse, anti-Semitism and responsibility for making #winning happen were largely swept under the rug. Sheen’s behaviour was often described as “antics” or dismissed, as “hey, look Charlie’s being zany again.”

In fact, during his meltdown heyday, Sheen was treated like a rock star. He landed a Rolling Stone cover and made several primetime appearances that provided him ample airtime to explain himself and his behaviour. Sheen was also the highest paid television actor at the time—earning a reported $1.8 million (US) per episode of Two and a Half Men. That kind of cheddar buys a lot of bowling shirts. Sheen’s mental state may have been questioned during his meltdown, but not nearly as much as that of a 2007 meltdown era Britney Spears.

Sheen’s media image hasn’t changed much since 2011. Coverage of his recent engagement largely laughed off his 2011 “antics,” instead focussing on his desire to have children with his new bride. No mention was made of Sheen’s history of domestic violence or lacklustre parenting record. Does this man even have custody of any of his other four children? Do his children just go directly from the womb to Denise Richards’ care?

Compare coverage of Sheen’s meltdown to that of Drake-lover Amanda Bynes or an umbrella-wielding Britney Spears and it doesn’t take long to see the double standard when it comes to celebrity meltdowns. At the same time Sheen was gracing the cover of Rolling Stone, Lindsay Lohan appeared on the cover of Vanity Fair in a piece that painstakingly detailed Lohan’s substance abuse issues and legal troubles. It also made frequent reference to her haggard appearance and questioned whether she would ever, ever get her once promising career back on track. The verdict: no. Sheen #winning. Lohan #tragic.

But Sheen’s not the only one benefiting from the media’s double standard. Once squeaky clean pop star Justin Bieber has had a DUI arrest, disrespected Bill Clinton while peeing in a restaurant mop bucket, egged a neighbour’s house, been photographed sneaking out of a Brazilian brothel and sparked a US petition to deport him. He also wants to change his name to Bizzle, which is not technically a crime, just kind of a crime against humanity.

Media coverage of Bieber largely downplays the severity of his troubles, chalking them up to growing pains as the singer transitions into adulthood and sheds his Bieber skin to become Bizzle. Like Bieber, both Bynes and Lohan started out as child stars, but their troubles are rarely attributed to growing up, instead the media focuses on their mental state or their drug use. At least Bieber is allowed to grow up. If the media had their way Miley Cyrus would remain in a perpetual state of Hannah Montana.

Despite finding drugs on his tour bus, pilots on his plane having to wear gas masks (is that even safe?) cause the marijuana smoke was so thick and sources close to Bieber—I refuse to make Bizzle happen—concerned about his addiction to Sizzurp (Google it) and pot, Bieber’s substance abuse and troubled behaviour has largely been portrayed as socially acceptable teenage rebellion. Again, none for you Miley.

Writing after Bieber’s recent surrender to Toronto police for allegedly assaulting a limo driver the media wondered if maybe this was all a carefully constructed public relations move or an image rebrand designed to improve Bieber’s bad boy image. Hey, it worked for Sheen—who I would like to point out is worth a reported $125 million (US). The media noted that Bieber’s record sales weren’t what they used to be. Perhaps vandalism and monkey abandonment were just the thing to get the record buying public interested in him again.

For Bieber being a bad boy is good for business. Not so much for Lohan. Her last film The Canyons was largely panned before it even hit theatres. Reviewers seemed unable to separate the Lohan they saw on the big screen with the Lohan they saw on the TMZ small screen. Lohan is definitely not the worst thing about The Canyons—next time perhaps the director could avoid hate filming his actors or people could remember that Bret Easton Ellis-penned characters are largely vapid and often laughable—but almost every review focussed on Lohan’s performance and never missed an opportunity to refer to her as “embattled actress Lindsay Lohan” or “troubled startlet Lindsay Lohan.” Chris Brown is always just Chris Brown not “Rihanna beater Chris Brown” or “violent misogynist Chris Brown” or “serial douchebag Chris Brown.”

Even if being a bad girl can be good for business the media is quick to remind us that this fame and success could vanish at any minute. During her meltdown days Spears made some questionable choices—shaving her head, marrying Kevin Federline, hanging out with Paris Hilton, just to name a few—that the media will never let her forget. Despite media concern over her post-meltdown career, Spears continues to top the charts, judge The X Factor and headline a two-year Vegas residency. Despite this, the majority of her media coverage never fails to mention her quickie marriages and rehab visits and suggests that another meltdown might be waiting just right around the corner.

And then there’s Shia LaBeouf. Where do we even start? If you’re just joining the LaBeouf crazy train already in progress he’s been plagiarizing people, punching people, walking out on press conferences while plagiarizing people, punching people at bars, fighting with Alec Baldwin and just generally behaving bizarrely. Rumours of substance abuse have long plagued LaBeouf. He generally brushes them off as “method acting” or blames others for not understanding his intensity (read: love of the sauce).

LaBeouf’s latest stunt involves his announcement that he is retiring from acting, followed by an appearance at the Berlin Film Fest for the premiere of Lars von Trier’s Nymphomaniac sporting a paper bag over his head with “I’m Not Famous Anymore” scrawled on it. It turns out this was all part of—wait for it—a performance art piece called #IAMSORRY that LaBeouf was mounting in Los Angeles. The performance involves LaBeouf sitting silently in a dark room with the paper bag over his head and various mementos from his career; including Indiana Jones’ crystal skull and a Transformers action figures. I give his show three 2009 Joaquin Phoenix’s out of five. Can’t LaBeouf just join General Hospital like James Franco did?

Media coverage of LaBeouf’s meltdown in the name of art has largely focussed on his eccentricity—there’s those zany antics again—and his valuable contribution to the dialogue around performance art. One media outlet even gathered a panel of performance artists to discuss LaBeouf’s work with one going so far as to say: “he’s starting a broad cultural discussion that needs to be had.” Way to go, Even Stevens—LaBeouf was a child Disney star too, but we don’t get reminded of this nearly as much as we do with Miley.

By embracing his performance art angle the media legitimizes LaBeouf’s bizarre antics. There’s no mention of his mental state. No mention of whether his career will ever recover. Media coverage of Bynes’ meltdown focused largely on her physical appearance, commenting on what she wore and how much her appearance had changed—and not in a good way—since her “25 Hottest Stars Under 25” days in 2006. Media rarely comment on LaBeouf’s appearance or commented on Phoenix’s I’m Still Here appearance, despite the fact that both of them are definitely less dashing as performance artists.

While the media regularly updates us on Sheen, Bynes has received little post-meltdown coverage. She’s doing better—having spent time in rehab and away from Twitter—but the media only likes a redemption story if there’s a male protagonist. Bynes only gets the meltdown and then she’s tossed aside. And while the Bynes story has a happy ending, that’s not always the case. If Lohan or Bynes were to die they would get a media circus of Whitney Houston proportions not the respectful coverage afforded Philip Seymour Hoffman or Heath Ledger.

I hope it doesn’t come to that, and that Lindsay’s actually been punking us all this time. Soon she’ll announce it’s all been one big performance art piece. If she did, the media would no doubt accuse her of stealing LaBeouf’s paper bag.